Weight 227.6lbs
Circadian Rhythm Reset Day 18
Nutrition Totals - None
Breakfast (11am) - 3c Decaff Coffee, black, unsweetened
1oz Crispy Nuts
Lunch (1:15pm) - 2 Devilled Egg Halves
1c Chicken Salad with Grapes
2 Boursin Cheese Stuffed Campari Tomatoes
1/8c LC Freezer Pickles
Dinner (6:45pm) - 4oz Ribeye, grilled
8oz Broccoli with 1 tsp Butter
1/4 c Sauteed Mushrooms
2 Tbsp Horseradish Sauce, homemade (1:1:1 Sour Cream/Greek Yogurt, Horseradish)
Bed - 1:30am
Notes - Had lunch with Linda Sue of LindaSue's Recipes fame today and went on a field trip to Trader Joe's in the Woodlands. Had a great time/visit with LindaSue and caught up with each other.
Trader Joe's was just "meh". Great staff and attitudes, ok prices, nothin' I can't find at closer stores or better quality at Hubbell & Hudsons for no more money. But they did have pretty cheap organic frozen spinach and organic frozen green beans! If I was a carb monkey I'd love that place! But everything prepared had soy in it. :(
Got overheated and over tired. Was in much pain. Received a release form about my reconstruction surgery from breast cancer. Scared the bejeezus out of me and just makes me feels so sad and desperate. I just still don't know what I "should" do! Or really what options are honestly still open to me. :( If I wanted to pull the plug on it today, would I already be permanently disfigured. Sure I know you're saying, "Girl you are already disfigured! You have no boobs. The cancer took them!"
But there is disfigured and disfigured. I can handle the Flat Stanley look as long as my chest wall is smooth and even and the scars are flat. But if you add in chest wall erosion, divots, puckers, and loose uneven dimpled skin on top of that? I will be heart broken. That's what they warn could happen to up to 30% of all patients who go through this surgery.
Makes me want to run away. I feel like shoutin', "Saddle up boys, your got to draw a hard line. When the gunsmoke settles we'll sing a victory tune. We'll all meet back at the local saloon. Raise up our glasses against evil forces and shout whiskey for my men and beer for my horses!"
You know? It just is the hardest decision I've ever made. Ever. So as a result I didn't sleep well. Kept reviewing my options and the things I need to do in the immediate next step phase over the next few days.
Woke up in pain. Of course. That's another thing. The pain could get worse! It's already freaking bad around the periphery of both expanders on my chest. :-/
Circadian Rhythm Reset Day 18
Nutrition Totals - None
Breakfast (11am) - 3c Decaff Coffee, black, unsweetened
1oz Crispy Nuts
Lunch (1:15pm) - 2 Devilled Egg Halves
1c Chicken Salad with Grapes
2 Boursin Cheese Stuffed Campari Tomatoes
1/8c LC Freezer Pickles
Dinner (6:45pm) - 4oz Ribeye, grilled
8oz Broccoli with 1 tsp Butter
1/4 c Sauteed Mushrooms
2 Tbsp Horseradish Sauce, homemade (1:1:1 Sour Cream/Greek Yogurt, Horseradish)
Bed - 1:30am
Notes - Had lunch with Linda Sue of LindaSue's Recipes fame today and went on a field trip to Trader Joe's in the Woodlands. Had a great time/visit with LindaSue and caught up with each other.
Trader Joe's was just "meh". Great staff and attitudes, ok prices, nothin' I can't find at closer stores or better quality at Hubbell & Hudsons for no more money. But they did have pretty cheap organic frozen spinach and organic frozen green beans! If I was a carb monkey I'd love that place! But everything prepared had soy in it. :(
Got overheated and over tired. Was in much pain. Received a release form about my reconstruction surgery from breast cancer. Scared the bejeezus out of me and just makes me feels so sad and desperate. I just still don't know what I "should" do! Or really what options are honestly still open to me. :( If I wanted to pull the plug on it today, would I already be permanently disfigured. Sure I know you're saying, "Girl you are already disfigured! You have no boobs. The cancer took them!"
But there is disfigured and disfigured. I can handle the Flat Stanley look as long as my chest wall is smooth and even and the scars are flat. But if you add in chest wall erosion, divots, puckers, and loose uneven dimpled skin on top of that? I will be heart broken. That's what they warn could happen to up to 30% of all patients who go through this surgery.
Makes me want to run away. I feel like shoutin', "Saddle up boys, your got to draw a hard line. When the gunsmoke settles we'll sing a victory tune. We'll all meet back at the local saloon. Raise up our glasses against evil forces and shout whiskey for my men and beer for my horses!"
You know? It just is the hardest decision I've ever made. Ever. So as a result I didn't sleep well. Kept reviewing my options and the things I need to do in the immediate next step phase over the next few days.
Woke up in pain. Of course. That's another thing. The pain could get worse! It's already freaking bad around the periphery of both expanders on my chest. :-/
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